Seeking the Attainable

By Keona Tang

So I've been thinking about where my life is leading me these days, and I've come to a conclusion. One of the keys to being happy is to set attainable goals for myself. I should aim for the things that are within reach, not things I can't control. For me, this realization is a bit of a breakthrough, because setting goals for myself has always been something I've kind of sucked at.

You see, I'm not an overly patient person. When I see something I want, I usually just grab it or buy it. This tendency explains my Funko Pop collection, as well as my impulse purchases of digital movies almost every week. I mean, I don't think I go *too* overboard, but at the same time, if I'm trying to save money, well... I admit, I'm not exactly great at it. Something to improve upon. 

Anyway, back to setting goals. When I was growing up, I hated certain aspects of school. Learning was wonderful and all, but homework and things like book reports sucked. Anything with a public speaking component was a pain in the ass. I especially disliked returning to school after a long break, because I knew the big question was coming... 

"So, where do you see yourself at the end of the semester (or in a year, or five years, or whatever)?" 

Inevitably, we'd go around the room and have to answer the question out loud and in front of our peers, few of whom actually cared about what I thought. I would just try to work around the question as best I could, usually stating

the rote answer of passing the class, moving to the next academic challenge, and so on. Suffice it to say, it wasn't my favorite topic to think about.

After all these years, I think I know why I detested that question so much. I think it's because I thought my life was settled. Or I thought it was, at any rate. I believed that life was going the way it was always gonna go. I was passively coasting through existence, never making waves or attempting to find myself along the way. To me, it seemed that the question was irrelevant. It felt like I was asleep at the wheel.

Now that I'm in my thirties, I see how foolish I was. I should have lived my life. I should have cared more about myself and my classmates, coworkers, and friends. Even strangers, for that matter. I should have been more open to different ideas, people, and experiences. 

I was so closed off. I see that now.

Last year, I made myself a promise. I told myself I'll never be content to coast through life again. I don't accept that the world is all bad and that life is constant suffering and that some vague notion of an idyllic paradise in the afterlife is all we have to live for. I reject that idea, because this life is literally the only thing we know that's real. It is, I believe, more of an act of faith to live our earthly life to its fullest, while certainly attempting to abide by a set of morals and values. 

To that end, I have set a goal for myself for the remainder of this year and into 2018: I vow to save up as much money as I can for the purpose of visiting my dear friend, who lives quite far away from me. I live in Hawaii, while she lives in Florida. I know I can save the money. I know I can make the trip out there, and I know that I will have the greatest time of my life. I know I have to do it, because as much as I love my hometown and my parents, I need to start living my own life. I need to find out who I really am, and what my strengths and limitations are.

I can no longer do that at home, though I'm also not quite ready to leave just yet. The point is that I now have a purpose, a reason to continue on. I know that this is the right thing for me to do, and though I'm sure there will be struggles along the way, I'm positive that this will be a good decision in the long run. 

Honestly, I can't wait to make this goal a reality! Meeting my dearest friend in the whole world has been something I've wanted to do for years, and going on a real vacation will be the best experience I've ever had in my life! This is truly exciting!

And I promise that I'll keep you posted, as we move forward from a year of transition and change (2017) into a year of dreams (2018) which will turn into reality! It's gonna be awesome!

Thank you for reading, as always! If you want to follow along with me, or just stay up to date with my random posts, please follow me on Twitter and like my Facebook page! And don't hesitate to send me a message or leave a comment! Peace!