Stuck in a Rut: Gilmore Girls, 2016, & What I've Been Up To in 2017

Wow, it has been a while, hasn’t it? After the rather tumultuous year that was 2016, I've struggled to think of a good first post of 2017 on this blog, and it's something I've honestly been avoiding over the past few months. But now, in the opening week of my birth month (sounds melodramatic, doesn't it?), I think it's time to take stock of where I am personally, and mention some events I'm going to attend this weekend.

Spoilers ahead, just to give fair warning!

First, though, let's discuss something fun: Gilmore Girls, one of my favorite television shows of all time, and I say that without irony or shame. The comedic timing displayed by the cast is legendary, and Amy Sherman-Palladino’s rhythmic dialogue and rapid-fire snark is some of the finest I've ever heard in a TV show this side of Joss Whedon’s work. For six seasons, the show dramatically and humorously detailed the trials and tribulations of the mother/daughter team of Lorelai and Rory Gilmore on the WB (and, later, the fledgling CW network). Then, something ominous happened: Sherman-Palladino and her husband and creative partner, Daniel Palladino, got caught up in contract negotiations which fell through, and the show continued under new management for one final season. The seventh season was indeed serviceable, but it never reached the heights of the Palladinos’ work, and it seemed that fans would never see the "true" ending to the show.

That is, until last year, when Netflix revived the series for a four-episode arc chronicling a year in the life of our favorite girls. The Palladinos returned this time, with nearly the entire cast in tow, except for one important exception: Edward Hermann, the talented and well-respected actor who portrayed family patriarch Richard Gilmore on the original series, had sadly passed away before the revival series was greenlit. This cast a funereal pall over the entire production, and there's an almost tangible element of grief and existential unease present in the storyline of the Netflix series. It's clear that Hermann’s death had affected the plot in more ways than one, but it also added an intriguing element to the show's core theme: just how does someone move on when life seems to throw curveball after curveball at you? How do you cope with the death of a loved one, whether he be your husband of fifty years, or your distant-but-ultimately-caring father, or your fiercely loyal and loving grandfather?

As the revival begins, we see just how much has changed in the lives of our three leading ladies. There's Emily Gilmore (Kelly Bishop), Richard's widow, and constant source of agony to Lorelai. The two of them simply cannot stop throwing verbal barbs at each other, even at Richard’s wake. On top of that, Emily faces a growing sense that everything she did in her life was in service of a man who is no longer present. Their huge mansion feels less like her home and more like a mausoleum, while her affiliation with the Daughters of the American Revolution social club feels tedious and unfulfilling. She begins to settle into a new phase of her life, including a burgeoning relationship with Jack Smith, an old friend she and Richard knew for many years.

Meanwhile, the aforementioned Lorelai (Lauren Graham) must come to terms with her strained relationship with Emily, as well as the fact that she never really experienced any closure with Richard before he died. In addition, her long-term romance with diner owner Luke Danes (Scott Patterson) has fallen on tough times due to a lack of communication on her part, as well as her own insecurities and feelings of isolation. Her longtime friend and business partner, Sookie St. James (Melissa McCarthy), has all but vanished, while her other partner, Michel Gerard (Yanic Truesdale), is seeking a better paying position as a hotel concierge, a position he fills at their inn, the Dragonfly.

Finally, we have Rory (Alexis Bledel), daughter to Lorelai and my personal favorite character on the show. Rory graduated from Chilton, a prestigious private high school, and went on to Yale University, where she graduated with a journalism degree and a desire to take over the world one article at a time… but it didn't seem to matter. With one big piece in the New Yorker under her belt, Rory seemed poised to succeed, but then a book deal fell through, and a pitch meeting with magazine publisher Condé Nast didn't take, and then a gossip website which had been courting her relentlessly decided to pass on actually hiring her. Not to mention her almost nonexistent relationship with her “not-boyfriend,” Paul, and her ongoing romantic tryst with the engaged and soon-to-be-married Logan Huntsberger (Matt Czuchry), whose relationship with Rory had seemingly ended at the close of season seven. Apparently, they had been secret lovers for quite some time when the revival series begins, though neither of them seem satisfied with the arrangement, particularly in Rory’s case.

Why the detailed summary, you ask? Well, each of the Gilmore Girls finds themselves feeling like they're stuck in a rut, or caught up in unsavory circumstances, and each of them are trying to desperately turn things around. Much has been written and said about the revival, especially with regard to the Gilmores’ privilege and status, and how the Palladinos have ruined the characters in one way or another, or how the ending wasn't really an ending. Perhaps these are all valid points of discussion, but that isn't what I'm going to tackle here. Rather, I believe that the central theme of the Netflix series has resonated with me, especially at this point in my life, because I (like Rory) feel like I'm stuck. That sense that I should be doing more with my life is something I have been living with for years, and it all came to a head in 2015 and throughout last year, as well.

Let's examine Rory for a second. She's intelligent, witty, driven, and beautiful. She has deep, meaningful relationships with good people in her life. She's found some success in the increasingly narrow and difficult to enter field of print journalism, and she intends to develop her skills as a writer and become a novelist. She has a loving family, an almost too-good-to-be-true friendship with her mother, and a lover who seems to care for her (even though their relationship is doomed and flawed, but I'll get to that in a sec).

However, she's plagued by uncertainty, insecurity, and self-doubt. Her life is unraveling, and she knows it. Her love affair with Logan is built on a foundation of lies and subterfuge, and while he may be able to live with his ethics and moral certitude compromised, she clearly cannot. Still, she's complicit in cheating on her boyfriend, Paul, who's absolutely an innocent victim in this. Furthermore, she's allowing Logan to cheat on his fiancée with her, which illustrates just how great her capacity for self-deception is.

I'm not saying that the Palladinos ruined her character, by any means, and I'm certainly not arguing that Rory is a horrible person and a bad character who clearly has fallen from grace. What I am saying is that Rory Gilmore is, ultimately, human. She's fragile, yet strong; she's upstanding, yet compromised; she's very, very flawed, and yet… she's one of the most amazing characters I have ever seen, and someone I relate to on a profound level.

I may not know how it feels to have had illicit love affairs or anything like that (thank the lords of Kobol), but I do know what it's like to feel trapped by circumstances beyond your control. I have gone through horrible periods of isolation and self-doubt. In fact, just last week, I felt so overwhelmed by upcoming events and work stress and anxiety that I just stopped talking to my friends, and I wanted to quit caring about everything. I wanted to stop hoping for something good to happen in my life, because I was convinced that hope only led to disappointment.

See what I mean about self-deception? I know I'm beholden to it.

God knows I have many insecurities. I don't particularly like the way I look, and I always think I should be doing more with my talents and my life. I'm very hard on myself, to the point of self-loathing and self-punishment. I need to learn to accept the person I am, and to forgive myself for thinking these things, and to practice being a little more compassionate toward myself. I need to ask for help more, and I need to lean on my friends and family for more support at times when I feel overwhelmed or isolated.

I need to love the person I am, and I feel like my friends will be the ones who help me do that.

To that end, I'm going to be attending Kawaii Kon 2017 at the Hawaii Convention Center this weekend, and I'm going to take lots of pictures and maybe even some video of the event and of my friends. Also, I'm going to go to at least one of the Video Games Live concerts that are happening at the Blaisdell Concert Hall on Friday and Saturday night. I honestly cannot wait to experience these two events! It should be an amazing (if money-draining, but totally worth it) weekend!

If you've gotten this far, I would like to sincerely thank you for reading this. Hopefully it's been an entertaining read, and maybe even helped you in some way. If you want to follow me on social media, I'm on Twitter at @KeonaTang, and I'm listed under “Keona Tang” on Facebook. I also write for GeeksGamers.com! 

Thank you so much for reading! Peace!